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I read a devotion today at Proverbs 31 Women~ "Bad Moments Don't Make Us Bad Moms." We do this to ourselves all the time. My mothering days are almost over but this has been a constant replay in my mind. Today I did great with my kids~ Good Mom. Yesterday I blew it~ Bad Mom. This is the case in all our relationships~ today I was a good wife~ good daughter. Yesterday I was a bad wife ~ bad daughter.
The truth is I have tried my hardest to be the best person/mom I could be~ when things were sailing along great~ the kids were behaving ~ school work was caught up~ the homemade bread turned out and my husband had a happy face when he walked in the door~ it was easy to be a good mom. But when things were not going so good ~ the kids were not so well behaved~ the dishwasher broke down and the baby is running a fever~ Bad Mom. We have a bad moment or two or maybe fifty sometimes! We are tempted to beat ourselves up. Life can be very heavy at times~ can't it?
Do you ever feel like a ping ~ pong bouncing back and forth? I sure do. I am a child of God, a wife, a mother, a mother-in-law, a grandmother, a daughter, a sister, a daughter-in-law, a sister-in-law, an aunt, a niece, a cousin, a friend ect...... we play so many roles. That is who I am ~ that does not mention what I do. I know it is the same for you. We all have many facets to who we are and what we do.
Sometimes people expect more out of us than we have to give. My daughter said something to me recently. Ashley said, "Mom we are way to hard on the relationships in our lives, we need to give more grace." Such wisdom~ I want to go a step farther. I have come to realize this is true. It is also true that we do this to ourselves~ we need to give grace to ourselves because after all God does. We will all have bad moments but that does not mean we are defined by those bad moments.
On the flip side of this if you are a person expecting and demanding to have someone love you or perform in the way you demand them to~ this is wrong. You need to give people the licence to be themselves and not demand to have everything your way. We need to take our empty cups to Jesus and not put that unreal expectations on our relationships. Today we need to give one another grace and allow people to be who they are not what we want them to be.
As a child of an addict I grew up always having an adult mind~ trying to take care of everyone and trying to make everything smooth sailing for all people. Mentally this has aged my mind beyond its years and I am tired. I have finally decided to give myself grace and stop this. When we reach this point we need to give grace to ourselves.
Ephesians 2:4-5
But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us,
Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;)
God's grace is there to cover us. He teaches us in our bad moments and gives us a second chance. I am so thankful I serve a God of second chances~ and thirds and fourths. He will always forgive. He is long-suffering towards His children. Forgiveness is there~ love is there. He never expects more than we can give.
Can I just say to you?~ If you are doing your best as a woman today then that is good enough. It is God we need to please ~not people. Even those that we love so dearly!
Give yourself some grace and rest in that fact. You are a good mom~wife ~ daughter ect... even if you have had some bad moments..... you are exactly who the people in your life needed in spite of the bag moments.
Let's live in that truth today.
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